Now I forgot what my product was... Hmm. Not Resolve (the carpet cleaner...though I do highly recommend it.) Ooh, I remember. Cracklin Oat Bran! Expensive and fattening, but very good. I first felt the spark in college...

Speaking of rekindling sparks (at least friendly sparks...), Sarah is dragging the past for old friends... After exchanging email with old high school friend Sean (still suspected as Sparky...) just last week, I noticed that boon friend of old Allen had joined classmates.com and, being to cheap to pay $39.00 to email him, I wrote him a letter, like through the mail! Then, heady with nostalgia, I tracked down an address for old college friend Ann and dispatched another letter. Who will be the next Sarah contact victim... Who indeed... MAYBE SPARKY if he discloses his identity. Though, I am still not convinced that Sparky is known personally to me. I still think he is a friend of my sister's. For reasons that are hard to pin down, he just seems a bit brighter than most of my friends (no offense...hehehehe)...

New pictures on my site (by the word "new")!! My most recent set of pictures have inspired me to start recording my camera settings to figure out what the $&#%)& is going wrong...

Blog silence is broken!! I have been inspired by learning a new word and also wanting to share a product recommendation with my blog reading public. In struggling through a crossword puzzle, I came accross the clue "slugabed's sin." I have never encountered the word before, but I instantly knew...I am a slugabed! The most flattering definition I could find is from the American Heritage Dictionary - "One inclined to stay in bed out of laziness." Less flattering from Roget's - "A self-indulgent person who spends time avoiding work or other useful activity..."

Geez, after my first modern day blog effort, I am not too tired to recommend my product. I will rest up until later.

Ah, too late for my beloved Pinky...

My lifespan timing sucks! Too late for the big prehistoric rodents and too early to have perpetual Pinkys...

Maybe I don't read other people's blogs as much as I should... Because, blogs are going downhill without my gentle guidance...

First of all...Summer's blog. Hmm. Nevermind, that would take too long... Well, okay, I will say this... If you want a REALLY INTERESTING critique of what is wrong with every though Andrew Sullivan ever had, click here. Summer has always had unnatural fascination with this guy. I don't remember her ever being happier than when the "bareback" scandal broke... Summer has made a huge mistake by adding a site meter to her blog. Now she is depressed that she is far and away her most frequent visitor... Ah, if only Andrew would flame her...

Then, there is Dana!... I take issue with her analysis of my Internet dating success! I think it has been wildly successful!!!! I have met some very nice people who I would not have met otherwise. Geez, what do you people expect!? As Amy's blog shows, Amy signed up and quickly duplicated my experience of meeting a very nice and normal man who she enjoyed meeting. Ah, the joy of vindycation...

Why is it if ever I am not seen at work the minute I am expected, everyone assumes Sarah has not properly notified her employer and is most likely dead. It never seems to occur to someone that I might have simply called in sick. Am I so reliable that I have to be dead to not show up at work... Dana in particular seems to expect me to meet a bad end soon. Last time someone died around here, she feared ("feared" might be too strong of a word...) it was me.

And Shannon has spewed more rat hating vitriol on her blog...

An interview with Shannon...

Q: What is worse than being gay?
A: The Girl Scouts funding a organ transplant operation on a gay rat with money they raised from stem cell research with stem cells harvested from Harry Connick, Jr's aborted fetus.

Erm...maybe you had to be there...

She is probably going to make me delete this...

Oh, why do I have to live now and not then!!!!

The Longest Day...

As we all know, Sarah about 4 hours of mental energy in any given day. So, eek, the horror of the Sarah Saturday now... I must wake up at 7:30 and drive to my 9:10 class in Cincy. The class ends an agonizing four hours later at which time I have to drive directly to work and work from 2:00 to midnight. For those of you good at math, you might notice that the ordeal takes 16 hours. That is four times my allotted energy for the day!!!! Eek. So far, on day 1 of class, I had to go to a wedding so I didn't have to go to work. Day 2 - called in sick to work. Day 3 - went to work and begged co-worker who happened to be there to work from 8 p.m. to midnight for me and went home. Erm...hopefully I will have adjusted to the idea by week 4? It is pretty clear to me that I wouldn't have lasted a day in a concentration camp...

Guard one - Why does that one keep trying to sneak into the crematorium line?

Guard two - I don't know what she has against 18 hours of force labored. She obviously has energy to spare with that butt...

Ahh, the problems of being delicate...

How ironic... Right when Mother leaves the area...

A new source for boyfriends, if I can find them...

Hey, this thing has spell check now!

Ahh, at least one of my blog readers appreciates me...

_____________________________________________

Hi Sarah,

Why so few pictures from your holiday? Wasn't that the holiday trip
that almost silenced the voice of the Inspirational BLOG? A day of fear,
always to be remember by your BLOG readers. The fragility that follows
Sarah on long road trips.

The people demand more pictures.

Lee :)

_____________________________________________

And people say I am cheap!

Click here for my NY vacation photos!

Nothing brings Sarah to the blog like a product recommendation... Today's product is Marzena Natural Wax Strings. While you can use this for whatever personal hair problems you might happen to have, I use them to wax my fluffy upper lip hair that occasionally catches my attention. This stuff is much better than all products I have ever tried. So many products do not live up to their claims, but this actually pulls out tons of little hairs! The box lasts forever, too. I got mine at Walgreen's.

I forgot to link to the Tofutti Cutie website the other day...

While looking for the Tofutti Cutie website, I came across this blog that might be of interest to us vegetarians... I haven't gotten a chance to look at it yet though... Also, for all you folks whose sense of justice is still evolving...

Having the blog sort of removes one of the reasons I need a personal assistant to handle all my important affairs. Throughout the day, I often think that I should remember to tell X about Y (for example, tell Shannon that the rates at the local loonybin have dropped considerably) and wish that I had a personal assistant to write it down and remind me later. Or, better yet, write it down and make the call X to deliver earth shattering news himself/herself. At least if I am at home when this spread the good news urge hits me, I can walk over and log into my blog.

A fine example of why I really need to win the lottery so I can hire a personal assistance happened yesterday. I was in Wal-Mart with Shannon when I saw a littles girl's dress with ABC's on it. (I have a weird thing about childlike clothes (please feel free to share any insight you my have into via email or my guest book...)) If I had the personal assistant, I could just point to it and say, "Get me one in my size ASAP." Same thing happened with some shoes later. I liked a pair of Wal-mart shoes but wanted them in pink. Naturally, pink was not a choice... Geez, really, my personal assistant needs are really pretty endless...

1. Like, right now, I am really wondering if my health food store has Yves brand fake cheese... I have been wondering about this for quite awhile, but haven't made it over there yet. Oops. Wait, I just realized I could call. Well, that is another good part about a blog! You can work through your problems...

2. Well, this I know I need. I need someone to sit at my apartment all day and watch to see what April does to May when I am not there... Their cage is on the table now so I can observe at all times while I am here...

More on this later, I am sure...

This is an extremely rare occasion. I am cooking something and I wanted to share this exciting experience with my blog reading public! I am making veggie spaghetti! It is a multi-step process, as you folks who are familiar with spaghetti know. I have even added onions to Bocca fake veggie meat and Ragu sauce. Oh, I should stop, I am probably making y'all hungy.

Okay, I ate it. It was pretty good. It will be a lot better after I refrigerate it overnight.

Just when you thought my blog could not get anymore boring...I am now struggling with the decision to go to sleep or go over to LeTonda's to watch a movie... Oh, what to do what to do.

Oh no. I just got a note from my ISP telling me I have the blaster worm and I might be spreading it to other computers. I must follow their directions in the note, which is probably from the blaster worm people in the first place, or they are going to cut off my service. Going to bed is looking better and better. I have a book I am really excited about so maybe I will read that for a bit. More on this book later...

Well, probably the "blaster worm" has done my public a favor by killing off this really boring post.

Let me just add that you should all check out the Tofrutti Cutie soy ice cream like sandwich! I just ate one and it tasted about 98% like normal ice cream sandwich! Well, maybe 95%...

Spanky, how do you know I don't have a friend named Dale?! We haven't seen each other in over a decade... Unless...with this last comment you sound kind of like Dan! Dan, fess up! And you pretend to not even read my blog!

I had another dream... Sarah is very freaked out by sea creatures, particularly of the long skinny variety. I about had a heart attack when I saw an octopus arm in the waters of Kiribati. I just saw the arm and darted off ASAP before I saw the rest. Turns out, there was nothing else to see. It was just a sea slug...

Anyway, in my dream, I was on a dock with my sister and some other people. Someone jumped out of the water after seeing a sea creature. I looked into the water and saw a terrifying nest of long skinny colorful sea creatures. I was turning to run away from the dock when Phantom fell in the water! I was deciding whether I was brave enough to jump in after her when I was spared the decision by waking up. Thank heavens because things weren't looking very good for Phantom...

Thank heavens! I am not getting chunked out of my library science class. Squeezing money back out of Kent State is impossible, so I would take a class in cat eyeball disection (only if the cats weren't mine and died a natural death) to avoid that fight...

So, getting up to rush to the library this morning was not for nothing since I will have to turn in my homework...

I have some pictures from my trip to NY that I will post later. Featured will be the world's cutest child and Niagra Falls...

I have a lot to say tonight! Tomorrow, I have to get up at the crack of dawn to track down 5 school library magazines to review for a class I might get kicked out of... Apparently, the class I registered for is not an elective for people not registered in the school library licensure program. I just realized this today, but I still have to do the homework in case I don't get kicked out of the class. Argh.

Eek, everything reminds me of me today!!!

On the back of a book entitled Why Girls Are Weird...

"When Anna Koval starts posting partially fabricated stories about her life in Austin on the Internet, she hardly imagines anyone beside her friend Dale is going to read them. Teaching herself HTML just seemed like a way to kill time at her library job...."

The picture on the cover features a frumpishly dressed woman with a cat on her lap...

It is not just me. Coworkers were overheard to remark upon seeing the cover... "Oh, a book about Sarah..."

Eek... From the news about the guy who blew up..

Friends of deliveryman robber don't find him capable of heist

ERIE, Pa. (AP) — Living in a rented cottage with hand-me-down furniture and three cats, Brian Douglas Wells was content to deliver pizzas 27 hours a week and spend much of his free time listening to his stereo. Money, say his friends, never meant much to him.....

With a few changes we could have...

Friends of pizza eater don't find her capable of heist

West Carrollton, OH (AP) — Living in a rented apartment with hand-me-down furniture and 5 cats, Sarah was content to eat an occasional pizza and spend much of her free time listening to herself nap. Money, say her friends, never meant much to her...

Woo-hoo! Unmaterialistic cat owners can commit crimes without suspicion (but we are going to sound kinda loserish in our news stories...)

Help! My rat May is suffering from domestic abuse. Mean old April (my rat, not my human friend) chews on May and pulls out her hair. She also tries to keep May from getting any of the good food, even if she herself has plenty at the moment. Well, actually, all rats do that and it is really hilarious. You hand one rat some food and she puts it in her mouth and then rushes over and tries to grab the food you are handing to the other rat. If successful, the rat tries to stuff the newly stolen food in her mouth but finds it is already full. This is particular funny with chocolate covered peanuts. This food thievery is only a problem for these two since the fat and robust April easily dominates skinny sickly May (mycoplasma, the scourge of rathood...)

I tried separating them, but rats are like people. They don't necessarily get along well with others, but they don't want to be alone, either. So, when I put them in separate cages, they look bored and sad. And then when I open both cages and let them roam at their pleasure, April goes to sit in May's cage for awhile while May walks around the table. Eventually they both end up going to the same cage to snuggle up for a nap. So then, they look so cute and happy that I hate to return them to their separate cages. I never see April actually beat up May, but something must be going on for May to have those sores. Me and the cats didn't do it and I don't think that May can bite herself on the back on her neck. Hmm, the cats. Last night Elsa did swipe May off the dining room table! A terrible assault on a sickly and weak creature. Elsa does have a mean streak... I yelled at Elsa extensively so hopefully she won't do it again. Luckily, May's indomitable spirit prevailed. When I put her back on the table she quickly waddled back over to the edge where Elsa swatted her off. I am surrounded by weirdos...

Last night I dreamed that I took two of my cats (Elsa and Phantom, I think...) to the vet to see if they were suitable candidates for a...cat foreign exchange program! Apparently, they passed their veternarian examinations and I was told to take them to the airport to fly them to someplace like Brazil in January. At first I was excited about this in my dream, but then I started to wonder if why on earth I would consider shipping my cats to Brazil? To share the wonder of my cats with others?! To expand the cats' horizons? Right before I woke up I started to worry that the Brazilian person was going to send me his/her cats... I always try to figure out what dreams mean... I think this one might have been sparked by reading a Dear Abby column about a husband who is obsessed with his visiting foreign exchange student. Also in way of explanation, yesterday when I woke up, I had three cats snuggled in my arms with their noses up by my face. I thought about how lucky I was to be greeted by so many friendly eyes in the morning. But then again that night, I was thinking how unlucky I am to rarely get to read in bed in peace without Bean sticking his nose under my book or Blacky kneading my stomach.

Then I dreamed that I systematically hunted down and killed all my blog readers with a knitting needle.*



*Just kidding...